Monday, June 13, 2011

In which my decision making skills are fucking AWESOME

So, it's a bit harder to be scared of an eldrich horror apparently invented by the internet (though I know that's not quite right) when you've had a really fucking shit day at job one and you're about to be late for job two because job one kept you for an hour past when they were supposed to.
My manager at job one wouldn't fucking let me go. And I was supposed to be at home ready to take calls from internet perverts for cash half an hour after the first job FINALLY let me go.
It was 9 o'clock at night. Had I gotten out of work on time, I could have taken the long way home and avoided the park AND gotten home before dark.
As it stood, if I wanted to get home on time, so as not to be late logging in to work, I had no choice but to walk home through the park, like I always would have.
I really considered just being late to the second job, I could have talked my way out of being in trouble. But unfortunately, I'd had such a shit day at the burger place, so many idiots and assholes, including my absolutely useless manager, that any fear of Slendyshit was buried under pure rage.
I managed to convince myself that I was being stupid, that I'd only seen tall, dark, and ugly last night because I was terrified and tipsy. He couldn't really be real, and so I should stop being a moron and walk home the short way, so as to not be late for work.

So, lets recap. Angry, stupid Elaine, walking home alone, at night, through the woods. Yeah. The outcome was entirely predictable. He was there. The entire walk home, he was there. Just watching me, head tilted at that creepy as fuck impossible angle. Every time I moved out of sight, he was there standing beside a different tree.
Thankfully, my self-preservation instinct kicked in at that point, and I remembered M's rules and didn't run. I walked as fast as I could, but I didn't dare risk running. It worked, clearly, otherwise I wouldn't be here, but it was terrifying. Cam called me ten kinds of idiot when I told him, too.

I think the worst bit was getting home and having to be sexy for pay for six hours. Especially because he kept fucking staring at me. Do you have any idea how hard it is to get a guy off when you've got a motherfucking eldrich horror watching you do so? Yeah. It's rather difficult.
I should get hazard pay or something.
Now, Cam and I are huddled in our living room, with the blinds very tightly drawn. River, our cat, has been freaking out all buggering night. It's not hard to figure out why.

I really should start following the horror movie rules, before my idiocy gets me killed.


  1. I'm binging your blog right now, and I can tell you, getting ANYONE off when He's watching is hard, but not impossible.

    Take it from me!

  2. Uhm. I've found that out, but I'm kind of scared of how you know that.

  3. You really, really don't want to know how he knows that. Just sayin'.

    I'm sorry that he started stalking you. Normally he doesn't do it that quickly..